Can AI help your relationship? What 1,000 married people said

A 2025 survey of 1,000 married adults in the U.S. asked a question most couples haven't said out loud: are you using AI on your marriage? The answers were bigger than anyone expected — and they point to a problem that's easy to fix.

The numbers

• 44% had used AI for relationship advice.
• 64% had searched online for help with their marriage before talking to their partner about it.
• 33% said AI "gets" their relationship better than their spouse does.
• 28% had made a financial decision based on AI's advice without telling their spouse.

Separately, RAND found about one in five young adults in the U.S. now use AI chatbots for mental-health support, and the pattern skews sharply toward Gen Z and millennials.

Read that again: "before talking to their partner"

The striking thing isn't that people use AI for relationships. It's how: alone, first, and sometimes instead. A third feel more understood by a chatbot than by the person they married. More than a quarter are making money decisions with an advisor their spouse has never met.

None of that is the AI's fault. A private chat is private. But it means the most common way people use AI on their relationship is also the way most likely to make it worse: one-sided, secret, and — because the AI only hears you — quietly on your side.

So can it help? Yes — if you're both there.

Used together, the same tool does something different. When both of you are in the room, the AI can't take your side because it's hearing both. It can say what each of you is actually asking for. It can do the math on the trip-versus-credit-card fight out loud, for both of you, at the same moment. There's nothing to hide because there's nothing hidden.

That's why SharedChat's Relationships room is written, in plain terms, never to pick a winner — and why it's tested to send someone to real help rather than "compromise" when a situation is unsafe.